Saturday 3 July 2010

Hot Russian Spy ‘Conditioned’ in UK

MINCH NORTON

The ex-husband of alleged Super Hot Russian Spy Babe, Anna Chapman, said he suspects she was "conditioned" by shadowy contacts when living in London. Alex Chapmanovski, 30, from Bournemouth, was married to the Russian babe for four years before they divorced in 2006.

The flame-haired 28-year-old wank-inducing super-hot uber spy babe is one of 11 people accused by the US of working as secret agents for Russia's intelligence service, the SVR.

Trainee psychiatrist Chapmanovski told officers that his suspicions were first aroused when he’d come home and always find Chapman with her back to him sitting in a large black leather swivel-chair, stroking a white cat. “As soon as I entered the room she’d swivel round and say, ‘Ah Mr Chapmanovski vee have been expecting you’”. He also recalled that she had an amazing collection of designer shoes, each with a retractable stiletto blade mechanism cleverly built into the toe. “I had no idea at the time but now it’s all making sense”.
Anna Chapman on her way to Asda

When shown photographs of their matrimonial bedroom and the wall that pivots 180 degrees to reveal a satellite communications system, a rocket launcing and guidance control panel and an array of high tech weaponry, Chapmanovski appeared to be dumbfounded, claiming that he presumed the equipment was his ex-wife’s health and beauty products and she would beat the shit out of him if he ever went near it.

Of her transition from wife to spy, Chapmanovski explained: "There was such a dramatic change, I felt I hardly knew her any more. She wore black leather all the time and when she arranged to meet friends, she wouldn’t invite me. She said I’d be bored because they’d all be speaking in Russian and discussing world domination”.

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